pic of
lil shroomies
"Go get 'em, ya tranny son-of-a-bitch!" - the lovely marydesibat

Ratty's froggie song:
 "'cold lil toes, cold lil toes, cold lil toes and a cold lil nose! 
 froggie froggie froggie froggie froggie froggie froggie
 froggie poison froggie killing 2000 mice
 froggie froggie froggie not yer only VIIIIIIIIIIIICE'
anyway it goes on to a chorus of cold toes! and froggie!"

them: we were going to let you in, but you hung up on us.
me:  a spider got on my arm.  scared the hell out of me.
them: you don't like spiders?
me : it was a big harry one, right there.

"Where I come from being "politically correct" means using language
that respects other peoples' oppressions and wounds. This chosen
language needs to be defended."  Leslie Feinberg.

"We don't kill with our speech, but we help the killers take aim... If you
wish, call me politically correct, a term bandied about by those who can't
stand to feel inhibited about their own bigotry." 
 - Los Angeles Times columnist Agustin Gurza

"I wanna be a complacent heterosexual!"
-Sophie Rollins

"I didn't even know Delaware was a real STATE!" - celeste on the new

celeste: imho, things are rarely BOTH usless and dangerous
jean: yes, you're too young to remember the horrifying wave of hula-hoop
deaths in the late fifties.
i was marked for life with a horror of the useless and dangerous.

"Yes, I read my own .plan every day. In fact, one could say I finger
myself often."  - Sophie, giggling insanely

"No, I really do have a thing for you." - Celeste to Cola, trying to
convince Cola that she really will get an xmas present. 

"Why does she DATE him?!" - Sophie, bewildered, on Mulder and Scully. 

Ann: What's a "plan?"
Celeste: That's... when you finger someone, their plan pops up. 
Ann: NEVER say that again! NEVER say that sentence in my presence again!!
Celeste: Hey, baby, want me to come over to your place tonight and MOUNT
my DISK?

Sophie: Does "reciprocal" mean I can infect all of you with strep?
Me: No, it means if you infect us we can infect you back... 
Celeste: ...BABY. 

[ Geek ] Message 2368 (1 left): Sat Jan 30, 1999  9:50pm
From: rat (tamerat@ella)
my friend carrie on why guys need to tell you how to install yer puters:
 *skerry* "Oh, it's too complicated for YOU little missie. Why don't I
come over there to install it, and then fuck you up the ass?"

"You're lucky I'm the kind of freaky person who can hold a conversation
while actually having an orgasm or else you'd be shit out of luck right
now." - robin
*Real Trannies Don't Want Scars*
By Tov
Real Trannies don't want scars,
Real Trannies are not named Lars.
Real Trannies don't want scars,
Real Trannies fight in bloody wars.
Real Trannies don't wants cars,
Real Trannies admire ruthless czars.
Real Trannies don't want scars,
Real Trannies smoke big cigars.
Real Trannies don't want scars,
Real Trannies pick up chicks in bars.
Real Trannies don't want scars,
Real Trannies want to drive big cars.
"What's going on?"
"It's an Ash Day."
"What's that?"
"It means that we don't have to go to school today."
"I wanna go to school!"
"So that I can stay home."
"You already do stay home!"
*satisfied tone of voice* "Then I got my wish."
                                -- Dinosaurs

Heidi, as quoted in cola's .plan: I had a dream last night that Antionio
Banderas was in love with me and we ran away to the Italian countryside
and lived in this fabulous villa there and grew grapes.
Me, later: Why is that grape/villa quote funny?
Cola: i can just see her dream.  it'd be like one of those i can't believe
it's not butter ads only with antonio instead of fabio.  they had been
parted from their love because of the cholesterol but now that they have a
chemically laden fatty spread to put on their toast, they can be swept
away by emotion and go to their villa where they grow grapes b/c wine
reduces the risk of heart disease.

"maybe it's just how tired i am, but i just keep thinking abouthow much i
miis cat... especially the sex.... god, the seeeeexxx....  i think it's cause i still have her collar hanging in
the corner of my room... that's really why i want to play the
saxophone... i need to strengthen my jaw muscles... if she ever takes
me back, i want to be ready, damnit!!! 
xi, will you teach me to play the sax? i want random meaningless sax!!
celeste could do the tuba... we could have a TRIO! mmmm... fingering...."
- sophie. okay, no, it was me posting as sophie. but she engineered it.

"I am the difrference bewten poulation means and I SOUND LIKE THJIS
aiaiaiaiaiaiaiaiaiaiai"                         -    socks
"Apparently I have a gargantuan penis." -- robin
cola: ::talking about the french ppl who want to give her a web internship
in France::
me: ::putting chapstick on, dropping it, trying to cap it, dropping it
again, flinging chapstick components around room uncontrollably::
cola: my GOD! now i see why the french don't want you!

Wed Aug  5 08:11 -- cola is thinking that art is a meat by product.

"Ohmigod! I almost threw up on you! That would have been WAY out of line!"
-Celeste, shocked at herself after trying to belch at me

[ Entertainment ] Message 992 (9 left): Fri Dec 5, 1997  3:11pm
From: gi jen (socks@ella)
Subject: confabs with becka
17 lines (?)
Thu Dec  4 19:02 -- beckala is a fried egg, no butter.
        Well, my picture is of a chunky, unedible peice of burned
something, laying on it's back on the frying pan, gazing at the ceiling,
but still serene however much it lacks butter.
(now I have to make this "Pretty". Under orders.)
So, it's /not/ just a chunky burned thing, but a fried egg with makeup,
it's nails done, and hair coiffed perfectly in a silk blouse, waggiling
it's fingers at me from across the room and making kissing noises and
saying "Ciao!" as it prepares to rejoin it's jet set lystyle with the
Gerbil so dissed in story node a few posts back.

[ Feminist ] Message 1556 (0 left): Sun Dec 7, 1997  12:02am
From: Aidan (danica@ella)
Subject: yes
12 lines (?)
you should use they to refer to me. reasons:
1. I think it'd be entertaining to watch people talk about me
2. I love to be entertained. See 1.
3. Since I spend most of my time not actually being "guy," or "girl,"
but identifying all by myself as like "woman identifying as boy
presenting as girl" or "drag queen" or "ungendered" (as in, i was
really in a hurry today and i didn't have time to put my gender
on... hee hee hee hee hee hee... you THINK i'm joking)
they comes closer than s/he or any single-gender variant you can
think of... since the choices are probably he or she...
4. The voices in my head demand to be heard!
5. And acknowledged!

*dduck* (# God I love you and I can't say it enough. It
makes me all tingly inside evertime I say it! BTW I am having c-sex with

"Watch my desk. It'll do tricks!"
-cola the blessed

"My favorite quote [from the Bible] is 'Abraham fell on his face.'"
-sophie the messed

"...It's hard to appear evil when you are ticklish *everywhere*."
                --Julie Harding

"The fans demonstrate respect for the francise by yelling, fretting,
stomping, cursing, running in tight circles and saying (in the immortal
words of Jerome Bettis, as captured one week on a microphone sewn into his
jersey), 'Oh my goodness, oh my goodness, oh my goodness, oh my
GOODNESS.'" - Jon Carroll on the sports world.

"I LIKE heels, because they just give you so much power. Especially big
thick ones. Every woman must have a pair of fuck-me pumps."

"You're born naked. Everything else is drag."
              - Tede Matthews, 1979, in the docufilm "Word is Out"

"If I can't fuck someone I've just met and come at the top of my lungs, I
don't want to be part of your revolution."
              - Karen Hurley

Holly came from Miami FLA
Hitchhiked her way across the USA
Plucked her eyebrows along the way
Shaved her legs and then he was a she
She says hey babe
Take a walk on the wild side
- Walk on the Wild Side by Lou Reed

"crack whore crack whore crack whore."
-me, spontaneously in the middle of explaining my gender to sharon on forum

"tell them you're making out with two cute redheads. how can there be
anger in that?" 
-ratty, on what excuses i should make for missing graduations

"Well, wouldn't you rather hang out with a real person than your Grandma
and Satan?" - scott, trying to talk me into coming over

        EMILY: Hey Robin, we needa figure out a way to splice DNA from
           two people of the same sex so you and I can have a kid.
        ROBIN: Yeah! That would rock!
        EMILY: But you'd hafta carry it.
        ROBIN: Doh.
        CHRIS: Hey wait a minute... what would gay men do when it came
           to carrying their kid? Like, carry a Ziploc bag?
        EMILY: *giggling* I guess... but what about food?
	ROBIN: *triumphantly* PURINA FETUS CHOW!

"yeah, i will admit to some internalized stuff. and it makes me feel like
a dork to be like "hmm. boy." because i was all on the bi-now, gay-later
plan and i thought i'd just be a big old lesbian for the rest of my days.
then i became a bi boy. what the hell." - robin

Cola: I understand not wanting to label yourself...
Jovida: ...and that just means you're BI!
Scott: yes. i did that bi now gay later plan too. and now i'm just bi
again, so -- whatever!

gah. i spent all morning and part of the afternoon at SFO, oh joy, and
then I spent an hour or so negotiating sf traffic in the financial
district. Actually that was fun in an extreme-sports sort of way.

[ Geek ] Message 2760 (3 left): Tue July 6, 1999  5:37pm
From: Buzbuzian! (tiffany@ella)
Subject: hmmm
16 lines (?)

okay, then i say that bagles and bagels are actually
long long long lost relatives, but neither of them is
willing to admit it....

thousands of years ago (but in food-type time, of course)
they were the same thing, but for some reason they split
off into warring tribes, and the bagles won, leaving the
bagels in the land of the creamy spread, which then induced
humans to eat the bagels, and leave the bagles alone.

this allowed the bagles to evolve to a higher, more intelligent
state of being.

am i missing anything?

[ Religion ] Message 665 (3 left): Tue July 6, 1999  5:25pm
From: nana (goofie@ella)
Subject: i will now post about supernatural bagels
9 lines (?)

for homi's credit:
there are bagels you & i do not understand.
they are not just the figurative bagel burden we
have all heard of.  they are bagels that will hold you down
and make it difficult for you to walk long distances.
oh yee supernatural bagels, i build a bagel doll
for which to curse you with!

"i am the mighty mac geek.  i carry paperclips with me at all times.
i bend them straight and the back to curved at a moments notice.
i reset imacs with ease.  i answer all questions and help lusers
even with applications i do not know.
i am mighty!!!" - cola

okay I need food.
Chicken ROLL!
I love chicken roll.
Makes me SO happy.
- Shahn: unintentional free verse.

i enjoy this exchange:
typsy: i'd like to buy the world a screwdriver,
and then throw a party for them at the
edge of a cliff
timanna: wow. 
...you might need to buy em more than one for it to be the kind of party
yer talking about.
typsy: heh. okeee... 5, then, 5 each should do it for most.
[ Grump ] Message 7982 (7 left): Mon Sept 20, 1999  2:28pm
From: grumpity t (goofie@ella)
Subject: mondays are cool cuz everyone else
15 lines (?)
is all unhappy & grumpy and i
'm just fine cause i don't go to work and my only semi
responsibility is darkroom techniques class which is
a good thing.

ya know, other ppl's unhappiness can make you happy,
all of those greeting cards stating otherwise are lying.

what should i do with the rest of my day?  poke ppl and watch
them wince in pain?  sit next to innocent ppl on public transit
and fart quietly but very stinkily & then move to a different
seat in disgust like they were the ones farting?

ah the possibilities astound & amaze.
[ Queer ] Message 1450 (9 left): Mon Sept 27, 1999  12:08pm
From: beef (beef@ella)
Subject: you see,
13 lines (?)
one time a few years ago, I was signalling to a friend across the room
that she needed to call me after school, so I was doing the
hang ten hand thing up next to my ear in an attempt to make it look
like a phone, and fred saw it and thought that I was talking/signing
to him.  He blushed and got flustered for a moment and then went on with
his blabbering.
So, I changed it to be "Fred, call me." in a husky voice...like some
1-900 number
"Horny international relations theorists get it on for you!
Hear them ally for some ass-smaking, agressive sex!
See them in their military garb...negotiations have never been so sexy!
Call now, 1-900-horny-ir!

"You know what Einstein did? Got Ds in his math classes! Know what
happened to him? He DIED!!!" - damien!

"Damien, what does it matter if you've got a spronk or a gidjit?  Heck,
you can have a zooblaft for all I care. The whole idea is to get *away*
from the biosex-based categories of wife/husband. Hell, if I end up naming
my spousal relations that way, they'll probably all have different titles.
Future conversation: "Oh, have you met my grunfretzs, Jack?  And this is
my spronkle, Xyban.  And over here is the zooble I hope will one day
become my neeblick, Aidan!"

The danger in a ghetto is directly proportionate to the amount of
ignorance and rudeness you bring in.

"ack, cola's .plan has /never/ been so funny.  i should regularly wake up
in the middle of the night and finger people, just so i can get a laugh."

DaNuchinator:    some guy from Egypt imed me
 Timelady:       wow
 Timelady:       how.'d he find you?
 DaNuchinator:   no idea
 Timelady:       weird
 DaNuchinator:   he's hard to understand , too
 DaNuchinator:   he's telling me he wants to marry an American and asking
if I can help.
 DaNuchinator:   yeah, I'm just the pimp for the job
     -- (me and my little brother)

"The elbow is a symbol of mankind's love for mankind."

"have you ever seriously thought about taking crack?
 it's scary, when you start seriously considering it, even if it's just
for a moment"

"*I* don't care if they expel me because I write vagina all over campus."
-Kate Eltrich

"ah! THIS must be strawberry.  orrrrr TROPICAL PUNCH!!"
-robin, eating jelly bellies at random

"Eisenhower's still dead and I don't have to go to Abilene."
- Jean

Jean: Bi-cultural Europeans....
Me: They're just cuter than *bugs*!
 (cola made me quote myself.)

"I'm completely devoid of nutritional value!"
- Cola

cola says, "functional breakup. that's like... giant shrimp. or... free
love. no, wait."

Ian Fried, on whether our MTF friend Val should apply to Mills as an
undergrad transfer student.... "They should totally be all over that!
She'd be the one student they could be sure would graduate as female!!" 

::giggling uncontrollably:: 
good quotes: 
1. (darren, blushing uncontrollably, after his first set of files-to-
update broke the live website, 45 minutes after the deadline for 
updates to the server, after we've sent all the fixed stuff off) 
Um... um actually, um, i have a new file to send. 
(diane, joyously) You SUCK!! 
2. (five minutes later: darren, leaning over my cube wall) DON'T send 
IO the file I just sent you! Send the one that says, "DAAAMN."

ratty: the world just makes me angry. they're like "studies show if you
give a group of boys and girls dolls and trucks, the girls will play with
dolls and the boys will play with trucks. well, no shit, they're already
socialized. *anger*
cola: what would happen if you gave them truck shaped plush toys? anarchy,
that's what! 

"Be very wary of anyone who says "most people" anything. This is social 
mind-control talk of a sort. Tess does not know "most people".  Neither 
do you or I. It's what they call "bandwagoning" in politics & 
advertising. "EVERYBODY drinks Coke." Don't be fooled." - Athony
Temple of the Astraea Household

"for some reason i don't LIKE to say pansexual or omnisexual. and i like
identifying with the whole bisexual movement, because they fucking
rock." - morgan

"i'm not multimplie!" - kim/ickle, attempting to convince us that she's
not multiple and no littles are out

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