The Bar: Original drinks recipes
to turn your brain into shrapnel?

The Aidan
Put in a few ice cubes. Fill half the glass with Godiva liqueur. Splash in some orange liqueur. Splash in some Cointreau. Flavor with milk (or rice milk, for you vegan party grrlz). Stir. Spray whipped cream all over the top.
Wander around the room with it, licking the whipped cream off with the tip of your tongue and beaming mysteriously (if you can pull that off) when people ask you what you're drinking.
I don't know if Godiva is vegan, but all my vegan friends have vowed to make an exception for it if it's not. :-D

Sex on the Futon
Tequila and organic apple juice, mixed to taste. It's the nineties' way to get fucked up!
(This has many variations; really, for "tequila," you may substitute "any unflavored hard liquor in the house," just as for "sex" you can substitute "anal, oral, dildoed," etc.)

The "Mo And Cola":
A vanilla milkshake with at least one shot of amaretto - or more to taste. (Recipe courtesy of Cola herself!)

"*, The Flaming Asshole": A Peculiar Cocktail
(where "*" is a wildcard that lets you put in the name of someone who screwed you over, as in "Sam, the Flaming Asshole.")
Mix in four equal parts, or whatever you deem appropriate:
Rum (for lust)
Scotch (for disgust)
Whiskey (for contempt)
Gin (for sadness)
A separate "sidecar" - a shot glass of vodka (for angst)
All mixed and fabulous? Okay. Scoot that shot glass aside for the moment. Take out a long match (my preference - I don't wanna be near that thing) and set the cocktail itself on fire. Down that shot o' angst and watch it all burn away, baby. (Dedicated to Robin.)

::experimentally:: the robin:
take one bottle of heather cream and your differently-gendered sibling's wardrobe. put one inside you till you find yourself wearing the other one.

Now that you've decided what to order, go to Cola's theory of drinking and find out what that says about your image!

Or go back to my home page.