"The government's going to move all these people to - where - to little
communities! Where they're going to build the houses together! You
can't GET much more Red than that!!" - on opposition to FDR's farm
"Maybe we should include [Once Upon a time in America] - I forgot about
Musingly, on my favorite historical films: "Adam Sandler and Pagan
"I'm a *highly trained* historian! I've read tons and thousands of books!
...thousands of books? God, yes!"
"It's okay to like foreign films."
"Jennifer! Tell us your name." - prompting her to continue roll call
"I'm not one of those *fuddy-duddy* historians."
On a series of BBC WWII documentaries: "...A film which oddly enough
prompted me... inspired me... DOOMED me... to
become a historian."
"When students watch films, their shoulders relax like this, and they just
take it in. And I thought, Gosh, that's powerful.
And a little scary!!"
"Film is where most people learn their history." (Not funny, but true.)
Andy, reverently, on the advent of Japanese cars: "They didn't break
down! and they had lots of extras to them! GLORIES like *cupholders*."
"Watergate is Nixon's -- I'm not going to say it's his Waterloo,
that would be *terrible*...."
"[Nixon] had personality flaws... unlike the rest of us...."
"Most history's about people, isn't it? Mostly groups of people running
around hurting each other."
"'Let's band together and take steps to cut costs! Let's break the unions
and get our workers to take less pay and work harder! And we'll increase
their working hours too!!' - They were drinking at the time." (andy on
the railroad owners in 1877, just before the huge strike)
"There's a big, very angry dog called the White South." - andy on how
had to treat Reconstruction
"Always save! Don't be a knave, backup and save!"
"Don't take a risk, backup on disk!"
"What I like to do is give you your tests, and let the shock wear off, and
then let you come and talk to me about it."
frosh: "We're going to be shocked??"
Andy: "No, no, I don't think you will be."
me: "You just said we would."
Andy: ".... You caught me in a LIE!!"
"You can taste Henry Ford in every bite." - andy on McDonald's and
production in the food industry
"Christianize these people and teach them how to eat corn."
"That's because I'm a delicate flower from the South."
"I'm feeling pixie-ish today!"
"Let's not talk about war too much. It messes with the model."
"Say I'm a woman in the 19th century...."
"I used to think that it was because it worked better in my schedule,
but now I realize it was just because I'm evil." (on why he teaches
"We are unclean people who have children." (on why students can't study
at his house)
"I got this out of a book so you know it's true."
"There's a problem with lobbing missles all over the world. What's the
problem? The world is round."
"Peanuts are a noble food to raise. I'd be _happy_ to be called a
"Finland is evil! Finland is evil!"
explanation: "andy said that once last year to demonstrate the use of
propaganda -- obviously finland is NOT evil, so he was using that to
demonstrate that if the govt decided to convince everyone of that, they
"I'm worried about the whole Canadian
issue." - on putting nuclear weapons close to the Canadian border.
"You shouldn't ever underestimate personal malice and spite." - Andy,
teaching about the AFL and CIO rivalry.
"It's the history of people being pushed off the land to make way for
"The comet was going to come down. Darkness would reign. The dinosaurs
would be gone." (on the old AFL/CIO leadership's demise in 1990s)
Bonus historian quotes: "In the old days, traveling across borders,
passport would be checked, your papers would be checked... Of course, in
the old days there was a war going on and you'd be shot." - Bert (on
pre-Common Union Europe)
"The police and the army are basically the same in any country,
police stay home and the army goes abroad." - Bert Gordon