a weird commercial by Duck, copyright 2002
INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT
A homey, neatly kept kitchen with the determinedly perfect air of a
1950s sitcom. LIBBY, a clean-cut fourteen-year-old, has spread mixing
bowls and spoons and other cooking detritus along the counter.
(looking in cookbook) Mom! Where's the polysorbic acid?
It's on the bottom shelf.
(scoops out a spoonful of glittering white powder; looks at recipe
and then in cabinet)
Mommmmmm! I can't find the natural coloring!
Which one were you looking for, dear?
(appears in kitchen doorway)
I'm sorry, Libby, but we're all out of the powdered carmine. There
are some dried beetles on top of the stove if you want to grind your
(pours beetles from tin into mortar and begins grinding away)
Do you think the cookies would taste better with a little MSG?
Well, honey, just about anything does!
Mom seated at kitchen table sampling a freshly baked,
picture-perfect cookie from plate Libby holds out.
Mmm! Tastes just like store-bought!